The On On Man

(Sung to the tune “Piano Man” by Billy Joel)

 

It’s ten o’clock on a Saturday

The regular pack pays their fin.

There’s a B-van parking next to me

Filled with kegs and a map to on-in.

 

I say, “Hare, can you lay me a memory

I’m not really sure where trail goes.

Not too long cause I’m beat and not lots of street

The cement pounds my arthritic toes.”

 

On on on di da da

La la, di da da da dum

 

Lay us a trail you’re the haring man

Give us some marks to steer

Well we’re not in the mood for an A-to-Z

And thanks for those checks full of beer.

 

Now Flash the GM is a friend of mine

He gives us down-downs for free

And he’d love to be hare but his hair ain’t all there

And a DJ’s what he’d rather be.

 

Hare lies, “Pack, I believe you’re not snaring me.”

Four miles hashing at an easy pace.”

It’s all flat as her chest so you may run abreast

or get busted and fall on your face.”

 

On on on di da da

La la, di da da da dum

 

Now Nut is a beer ingest flatulist

His farting sure smells pretty ripe

And he’s talkin’ with Pinky, who’s drinkin’ a drinkie

And playing with his Scottish pipe.

 

And the RA is singing of donkey dicks

As the brewmeisters get us all stoned

Yes, I’m starting to think that the OC Hash

Is getting all Bozo-da-cloned.

 

Lay us a trail you’re the haring man

Give us some marks to steer

Well we’re not in the mood for an A-to-Z

And thanks for those checks full of beer.

 

It’s a pretty good pack for a Saturday

And the hashcash sits counting the wad.

But she’s short a nickel so sucks on a pickle

And dreams of some young hasher’s bod.

 

And the circle’s song sounds like some animal

And my jockey shorts smell like a steer

And they get in my car and bitch trail was too far

And say, “Man, we could sure use a beer.”

 

On on on di da da

La la, di da da da dum

 

Lay us a trail you’re the haring man

Give us some marks to steer

Well we’re not in the mood for an A-to-Z

And thanks for those checks full of beer

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